Paul B Thomas

How not to be a victim of someone else's sins.

1 . Its not what happens 'to' a person but what happens 'in' a person that determines whether he or she lives free from the pains of the past.

2. Most hurt folk take a one off event and then turn it into a lifelong crisis. They relive the past as if it happened fresh to them this morning. These people are not free they are bound, not by the event but by their refusal to break free from emotional bondage and a relationship they should have buried years ago.

3. People who harbor grudges sink their own ship. They pronounce a curse over themselves by living with what aught to been buried long ago.

4. In the apostle Paul's day, if a man murdered another, his punishment would be to carry the corpse of another murderer, strapped to his own back. He would be made to walk the streets daily until the stench of the body permeated his flesh and his soul cracked under the emotional strain of carrying the corpse of another.

Imagine, living day and night with a dead man's corpse strapped tightly to your body! well living with yesterdays pain and guilt and carrying the rejection of a broken relationship is no different. If you are carrying something that aught to have been buried, then you too are serving a death penalty.

Tell me who is paying the price for their sins of the guilty? is it not the innocent!

5. Refuse to take on the sins of the guilty, if you do you too will live the life of the cursed.

6. The corpse on the shoulder soons turns into the chip on the shoulder when you choose not to release your past and let it go.

7. Hurt people hurt people. If you are hurt, dont seek to be involved in another relationship until you are free from the pain of the past, otherwise your new mate will sooner or later remind you of the guy you married the previous time before and separation and divorce will once again be on the agenda.

8. You don't belive me ! well just hang around sometime and you find everone makes the same mistake more than once.

9. If you are angry with your ex. Forget falling in love. You cant hate a previous mate and love a new mate at the same time. Sooner or later what's in you is going to be made manifest and rise to the surface in anger, hatred or frustration and you will repeat the same story all over again. Same story just a new chapter.

10. First get yourself free from your past then you be able to create a new tomorrow.

11. How do you know you are free from your past ? when what happened to you is no longer a topic for discussion or an a subject for negotiation or an issue for contemplation. Thats when you know you are free from the past.

12. Words give something life. Death and life are in the power of the tongue. Talking about your ex resurrects the relationship that's why some folks can never break free from the pain. Talking about it dont heal it. Only Jesus can heal a heart and talking to him about it releases you from the grip of self destruction.

13. As you leave is how you enter. If you leave a relationship mad, bitter and angry, you will enter another new relationship mad, bitter and angry.

14. Having another man is therefore not your solution. Having a new marriage wont get rid of the problem. They problem is not solved by a new relationship. The problem is solved by first making up your mind 'its over' for me, im closing the door, burying the dead relationship, getting rid of the corpse and pronouning the last rites over what didn't work, could not work and will never work.

15. When you are healed, you are then ready for a new relationship.

Paul.
copyright 2006